January 2019

Resolving child custody issues is one of the toughest aspects of divorce. Parents want to do what is best with their children, but agreeing on what is best can be difficult. Mediation creates an organized environment in which parents discuss various issues and come to an agreement about custody. It gives parents control over decisions, but provides structure and facilitates guided communication to help them reach an agreement. What are the five best reasons to choose mediation for settling your custody dispute?

Mediation is Non-Adversarial

Issues settled in the courtroom often create a win-loss scenario. No matter how things turn out, someone feels as if they have not gotten their way. In many cases, both parents feel slighted. Mediation provides a non-adversarial approach in which everyone involved works toward a solution in the best interest of the child. Mediators eliminate the feeling of me-against-you and help parents work toward the best solution.

Mediation Makes Things Easier for Children

Since parents remain in the decision-making role and work together as a team, children continue to see them as the main authority figures in their life. Kids observe their parents putting aside their differences to do what is best for the family.

Mediation Focuses on Moving Forward and Establishing Healthy Relationships

The skills learned in custody mediation can be used later in life. Parents who choose to share parenting responsibilities will need to make important decisions together for the foreseeable future. Getting a strong start helps parents build a healthy relationship regarding their shared responsibility for their children.

Mediation Reduces Stress

Finding a way to settle disputes without endless bickering and trips to the courtroom reduces stress for everyone involved. When families are able to settle disputes efficiently and without turmoil, the spirit of the family remains intact.

Mediation is Less Expensive and Less Time Consuming

Some custody issues can be settled in as little as a few hours when mediation is used. Parents set the tone for how quickly issues are resolved, so if they are eager to reach a solution, they can. When custody issues are litigated, it can take weeks or months to settle the dispute. Families are at the mercy of the court system, which means the chaos of custody battles can continue for a long time. And since mediation allows issues to be resolved more quickly, it costs less money.

If you are looking for a way to settle your child custody dispute, consider the benefits of mediation, and the mediators in the UK are the Barclay DeVere’ mediators. You can find out more about their services, pricing and testimonials on their official website, and to check what UK counties they cover you should refer to this link https://www.barclaydevere.co.uk/mediation-locations/.

A financial agreement reached in mediation is not in itself legally binding. However, the family mediator will draw up the agreement in a formal document known as a Memorandum of Understanding which can then be sent to each parties’ family lawyer so that the lawyers can sort out the process of making the agreement legally binding. The mediator can only do this if both parties consent to the Memorandum being sent out to the Solicitors as the agreement is strictly confidential.

This process does not double up on costs because the couple have usually saved money by sharing the cost of the mediator to reach their agreement. The alternative is to pay the separate hourly rates of two family lawyers to conduct arms length negotiations on behalf of their respective clients. However, couples do need to find the method that works best for them.

Mediation can be very cost effective for couples who wish to commit to finding their own solutions through direct talk rather than an exchange of legal correspondence.

If an agreement is reached in family mediation regarding arrangements for the children, it may not be necessary or appropriate for the agreement to become legally binding as an order of the court. Much will depend upon whether proceedings have already been issued at the court to resolve issues to do with the children.

Mediation can take place before or during the court process. The great thing about mediation is that it is completely flexible.

Increasingly, the government are encouraging couples to consider mediation as a positive alternative to litigation. This is particularly so where the dispute is about children. It is far better for children if their parents can come to an agreement about how they should be cared for rather than a Judge or Magistrates. Children can be affected badly by any acrimony between their parents. There can be no doubt that court proceedings are likely to escalate feelings of anger and resentment between the parents which in itself can rebound on the children. This may not be what parents mean to do, but it is all too common. Research has proven that where successful mediation has taken place, the negative impact of separation and divorce can be lessened for the children as well as their parents.

The Government have recently introduced a protocol which requires parties who wish to litigate to attend an introductory meeting about mediation with a qualified mediator, such as Family mediation Miams, to see if their problems can be resolved through mediation rather than court proceedings. These are called Mediation Information and Assessment Meetings or MIAMS. Court proceedings should always be the last resort for family disputes as they are expensive and emotionally draining. The new protocol makes it clear that the Government expect parties to properly consider the alternatives to litigation before taking the step of issuing proceedings. This approach will be backed up by the family courts who will expect to see evidence at a first hearing that parties have attended a MIAMS and at least considered whether mediation was suitable for them before resorting to litigation.

Even if mediation is not suitable for couples at the outset and court proceedings are issued, this does not stop parties later deciding to try mediation once proceedings are underway. If the mediation is successful and an agreement is reached, the parents can then request that the court make an order based on the agreement reached at mediation. Whether the court agree to do so will depend upon the court’s view about what is in the best interests of the children. However, if the agreement is sensible and meets the welfare needs of the children, the court will often grant the order requested. A court may even adjourn proceedings to allow the couple to mediate to resolve their differences. This may be something that the Court orders of its own volition or it may be as a result of the parents or their Solicitors requesting it.